Tools That Actually Help—Biofeedback to Breathing Cards

You’ve tried counting to ten. You’ve tried time-outs. You’ve tried reminding them to “take deep breaths.” (Side note: are you taking deep breaths?) And still, the dysregulation shows up like clockwork—right when you need to leave for school, or when it’s time to put the iPad away, or when reading homework makes everyone cry.

Regulation is a skill—and like any skill, it needs practice and the right tools. The good news? There are a lot of them. The better news? You don’t need to use all of them to make a difference.

First, a little context

Regulation happens in the nervous system, not the behavior chart. And for kids with executive functioning challenges, their nervous system often lives in a state of overwhelm. This makes it really hard to access the very skills we’re asking them to use (like impulse control, flexibility, or reflection).

Dr. Russell Barkley emphasizes that emotional self-control is one of the biggest barriers for kids with ADHD—not because they don’t know what to do, but because their brain doesn’t give them enough space between stimulus and response.

So, we create that space for them—with tools.

What works (and why)

1. Mightier

This biofeedback-based tool uses games to teach kids how to recognize and lower their heart rate. It gives them immediate, playful feedback about what’s happening inside—and how to change it.

Why it works: It externalizes internal states, helping kids see what calm feels like.

2. PlayAttention

This one requires a trained practitioner, but it is worth the investment, and sessions are only 15-20 minutes long. PlayAttention is a neurofeedback program that helps kids build attention stamina, mental flexibility, and impulse control through brainwave monitoring.

Why it works: It directly trains the parts of the brain responsible for EF skills, in real time.

3. Visual Anchors

Breathing cards, mantras, social stories, symbolic stuffies—these can help kids visualize what all of our strategy talk means. Talk less, play more.

Why it works: Kids need structure to practice self-regulation. A visual gives them an anchor.

4. Movement + sensory stations

A corner with a yoga mat, resistance bands, or even just space to stomp can help discharge energy. Add weighted items, a squishy ball, or a quiet “cave” for kids who need to retreat instead.

Why it works: Physical regulation often has to come before emotional regulation.

5. Reflective routines

This is underrated and totally free: debriefing after a meltdown. Not a lecture—just gentle reflection.

Try: “Hey, that got big. Want to talk about what helped you come back?”

Why it works: Talking when calm helps build metacognition—the foundation of self-awareness.

You don’t need a therapy room

You don’t need to turn your home into a sensory gym. You just need to figure out what regulation tools your child responds to—and use them predictably, not punitively.

Dr. Dawn Huebner writes in The Opposite of Worry, “We don’t eliminate anxiety—we build skills to ride it out.” The same goes for dysregulation. The tools are life jackets, not solutions. They help kids stay afloat while they learn to swim.

Try this at home

Ask your child: “What helps your body feel better when things feel big/heavy/overwhelming?” Then make a short list together and post it somewhere they can see.

Let regulation be a shared language—not just something they’re expected to figure out alone.